I wasn’t raised Catholic, but having been in real estate, I’m all too familiar with St. Joseph.
If you don’t know who he is then you’re either a) not Catholic or b) haven’t tried to sell a home.
Based on my sources, I understand he’s the patron saint of families and homes. And he has developed one awesome cottage industry for himself and the Church.
So it looks like I’m one signature away from having my condo under contract. Woo-hoo! Let’s keep those fingers crossed.
This entire process has reminded me of my days as a realtor in DC, days that – previously – I had tried hard to forget. There’s no joy in remembering the 11pm phone calls from panicked clients, the conversations with shady agents, or the contentious settlements where people heatedly called the other party derogatory names.
However, in the midst of all these ugly stories, one bizarre anecdote re-surfaced that – at the time – I dubbed, “The Curious Case of the Missing Bathroom.” If you enjoy Sherlock Holmes mysteries (or better yet, an Encyclopedia Brown story), you’ll get a kick out of this…
…Including blow-up dolls and whores?C’mon. Give us YOUR interpretation of this ad.
Michaelangelo:Yesterday when I finished my swim, I was the only person in my section of the women’s locker room. That doesn’t mean I was alone. On the contrary, it was clear there was another person in there with me on the other side of the lockers, because I could clearly hear her cell phone conversation.
“Dat Joe is a playa. His sh*t really makes me mad. He gotta stop f*ckin’ with me like dis. His dick is…”
It was a long, angry and foul stream of language that made me instinctively hide my iPhone and car keys because I worried that I was sharing the locker room with a bonafide gang member. Just as I was in the process of sliding the cash from my wallet into my pocket, I heard another voice interrupt her with a pissy, “Shh. Please?!”
“Oh, sorry,” she responded.
I wanted to step around the lockers and get a look at the woman who shushed her. Because I’ve always wondered exactly what “balls the size of Texas” look like.
pithypants 
