I love: public speaking to a full house, asking people nosy questions without them becoming offended, eating meals in my bathtub, drinking wine, writing, Spoonerisms, traveling and making people laugh (often at my own expense).
I don’t love: people who walk four-across on the sidewalk, screaming babies, obligations, inefficiencies and eating foods with a creamy texture (like cream cheese, sour cream, mayonnaise, pudding or cottage cheese, in case you were curious).
And now for my bio:
I once had wealth, power, and the love of a beautiful woman. Now I only have two things: my friends, and… uh… my thermos. Huh? My story? Okay. It was never easy for me. I was born a poor black child. I remember the days, sittin’ on the porch with my family, singin’ and dancin’ down in Mississippi…
Oh, and plagiarism. I love plagiarism. And Steve Martin.
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