Why I’m not a television producer.

10 Aug

Last night, while walking into my kitchen and seeing a tray full of enchiladas that I had made (ostensibly to take for lunch the rest of the week), I thought, “Well, don’t mind if I do!”

Except the thing is, I used a high-pitched lady voice that sounded the actor in “Little Britain USA” when he impersonates the old woman who talks to her dog. It was really weird, and my head-voice creeped me out a bit.

But ONLY a little bit, because immediately after, I thought – back in my normal head-voice, “Someone should start a 30 minute television show, called ‘Don’t Mind If I Do!” It would be kind of like Candid Camera, except people would just help themselves to other people’s things.

Interestingly, this is one of the first image results on Google when I searched for "Don't Mind If I Do!"

Picture it: Someone is taking cash from an ATM; another person walks by, announces “Don’t Mind if I Do!” and pushes the person out of the way to claim the dispensed bills. Same thing at Ben & Jerry’s, except it’s an ice cream cone. Or at the Metro, the last person to squeeze on the train after shoving someone else out of the way.

I’m thinking there’s high comedic potential here.

Don’t mind if I do!

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3 Responses to “Why I’m not a television producer.”

  1. Liz August 10, 2010 at 1:33 pm #

    Love the idea!

    • pithypants August 10, 2010 at 2:09 pm #

      Thanks. It’s kind of fun to think of situations in which you could use that phrase obnoxiously. I feel a brainstorm coming on tonight!

  2. Alicia August 17, 2010 at 12:06 pm #

    don’t wait for TV. Just start doing it on your own You Tube channel. Get someone in line for the chairlift at a ski lodge that you bump out of the way. Or how about going up to some tourist family with a totally whiny, obnoxious kid and saying, “Don’t mind if I do” and then going up side her/his head?

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