“Don’t use the paper towels! That roll is just for display!”
Really? A roll of paper towels can be just for display? And who, exactly, displays paper towels?
Well, let’s see… how about THIS GIRL.
Yes. Ever since I installed the new paper towel holder in such a way that I have to completely disassemble it to replace the roll, I’ve been using them sparingly. Very sparingly.
So sparingly, in fact, that Alan once asked me how it was that I could take a normal paper towel (and by normal, I’m talking about the small “choose a size” variety) and rip it into six pieces for distinct and separate uses. What can I say? I’m good.
In addition to using them sparingly, my other little trick is to have a REAL roll of paper towels hiding in the cupboard. And so it was tonight that I found myself shouting to Alan to NOT use the paper towels, so I could fish out this secret roll for the beer he had just kicked over on the floor of my study.
Yes. There are a lot of quirky rules in this house. Fortunately, Alan just rolls his eyes.
pithypants 
I pray for Alan…