Nothing says romantic getaway like…

3 Jan

During the three years we’ve been together, Alan and I have established a nice tradition of celebrating Christmas on New Year’s Eve. We grab a stack of books, some good bottles of wine, a bag of board games and go somewhere rural with a fireplace. This year, that place was Gramercy Mansion, just north of Baltimore in Maryland horse country.

The house was beautiful and the staff was friendly, and the added bonus was the resident cat, a huge white footstool of a thing named Romeo, who purred like an idling freight train. Don’t believe me? We pet him on the upstairs landing of the staircase while an elopement ceremony was being performed on the main level and they could hear him. Here’s Romeo:

Since I don’t have a television at home, when I stay in hotels, I enjoy browsing around to see what sort of stuff is on the more obscure cable channels. Which explains how we ended up watching “High Hitler” the History2 channel Sunday afternoon. Three interesting things I learned during this show:

  1. Hitler was regularly injected with meth by his personal physician, who claimed it was a multi-vitamin.
  2. Hitler is believed to have contracted syphilis from a prostitute in his teens, which would explain why he a) railed against the disease (calling it an enemy of the people) and b) was crazy.
  3. Hitler was vegetarian and had serious digestive issues, which his doctor treated by dosing him with a mixture of peasant feces.

Image Source: OMGFacts.comFascinating stuff. In fact, so fascinating that it gave rise to the following discussions with Alan:

Me: They just said he may have been in the final stages of syphilis. Was it deadly? 
Alan: Yeah, I think so. I don’t think it’s treatable.
Me: It must be treatable. Otherwise, we would hear about celebrities battling syphilis, right?
Alan: Fair enough. Let me google it. 
Alan googles it then shows me the entry. We both recoil at the photos of lesions. 
 
Image Source: http://www.pitch.com/binary/9519/buried_body.jpgMe: Remind me, how did Hitler die?
Alan: Shot himself.
Me: Right. And Eva Braun? 
Alan: Cyanide, I think.
Me: Yowsas. Cyanide isn’t immediate is it? I mean, it’s painful, right?
Alan: Pretty sure. Let me google it. 
Me: You better hope nothing happens to me this weekend. Because if they search your technology, you’re f*cked. 
 

Who says I’m not romantic?

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7 Responses to “Nothing says romantic getaway like…”

  1. thesinglecell January 3, 2012 at 8:13 pm #

    Peasant feces. No wonder he always looked like he had a digestive complaint. Kind of makes you wonder how evil he would have been sans syphilis, eh? (Also an untreated syphilitic: Al Capone.) Also, the way cyanide poison victims die gives one pause. Why would the military/government give its high-level clearance personnel and soldiers cyanide capsules to swallow? “Here. Don’t give away our secrets. Instead, have some seizures, stop breathing a few times… and then die.”

    And am I the only one who things the very purry Romeo could have been Hitler’s evil kitty?

    • popdialectic January 3, 2012 at 8:50 pm #

      YES! I was thinking he looked like Dr. Evil’s cat. Good call.

    • popdialectic January 3, 2012 at 8:57 pm #

      Or better yet, Ernst Stavro Blofeld.

  2. allenavw January 4, 2012 at 1:26 pm #

    Ahh a regular injection of meth explains so much! He was probably such a bitch because he wasn’t getting the hit he needed all the time.

    Meth is a helluva drug.

  3. Lorna's Voice January 4, 2012 at 5:34 pm #

    Funny story. Makes me want to clear my search history. I search for some wacky things for my blog photos…

    Hope you had a lovely get-away!

  4. Silva Gang January 5, 2012 at 2:22 pm #

    Yes, I believe if something happened to you, and the authorities found your husband’s phone with a history of syphilis and cyanide, he’d be brought in for some serious questioning. Maybe even some probing. Let’s hope nothing happens to you. By the way, wow… nothing says “romantic” like watching a show about Hitler while on vacation! 😉

  5. Paul January 5, 2012 at 10:05 pm #

    You find the most interesting little pictures to accompany your posts. Such as, the workman signage that depicts a guy burying someone …

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