Forgiveness can actually be just as rewarding as revenge...
A post titled “Today Is Global Forgiveness Day” recently caught my attention, so I googled the holiday to see what it’s all about. (I know, it seems rather self-evident, so I’ll start celebrating by forgiving you for assuming I’m an idiot.) As it turns out, according to HolidayInsights.Com, this “holiday” is actually celebrated August 27.
I’ll also forgive the person who led me to believe it was in July. (And maybe she’ll forgive me for pointing that out.)
Wow. This forgiveness thing is really freeing.
Since I’m on a bit of a roll, why don’t I just bury the hatchet and release some of those grudges I’ve been carrying? Here goes…
- To This DC Librarian: I forgive you for hating people so much that you spent five long minutes pretending to shelve a book just so you wouldn’t have to acknowledge me.
- To Mr. Porsche Driver: I forgive you for blatantly stealing the parking spot I had been waiting on for ten minutes. Clearly you’re important. I should’ve gathered that from your car. And also? It’s probably uncomfortable to be in public when you have what I assume must be an unnaturally small penis. I should’ve been more understanding.
- To Mr. Stompy McStomperson Who Lives Above Me: I forgive you for waking me up every day between 3:30 – 4:30am. I will stop shouting “A pox upon you!” But I won’t stop plotting ways to discreetly slip you Benadryl.
- To This Guy: I forgive you for souring the air in my yoga glass. And I hope you’ve discovered Bean-O.
- CVS Cashiers Everywhere: I forgive you for taking slow to a new level. You can be a tortoise to my hare.
- To The Woman Who Hit Me With Her Car: I forgive you deciding it was a good idea to accelerate when the sun blinded you. And for over-staying your welcome at the Emergency Room.
- To The Client Who (Figuratively) Asked Me to Bend Over When Negotiating Pricing: I forgive you for being a cheap and miserable person who clearly finds no joy in life outside your employment.
- My Old Yoga Teacher: I forgive you for sitting on my hand and ruining my savasana.
Whew. That was therapeutic. Now tell me… who are YOU forgiving in celebration of this great day?
pithypants 
Okay FIRST of all, I need to take time to go back up and read all of the posts to which you were referring (I can’t wait. Unfortunately I have work to do so I HAVE to wait, but now I have something to look forward to). Second of all, I have marked my calendar and will be totally acknowledging my forgiveness to others on August 27 thanks to your inspiration. In the meantime, I forgive my husband’s somewhat less than super classy best friend and his wife for having a gigantic co-ed baby shower in the state next to us and having a 16-page baby registry and not letting him leave early to return to me because you wanted him to ‘cool off’ in the pool before he left. You only get to see him like 3 times a year and I get to see him always. And besides, I didn’t have to go. WOOHOO!!
That’s the spirit! Keep it classy, parents-to-be!