I can count on one hand the number of times Alan and I have gone to out to a movie in the past year. In fact, even if I accidentally reached into a operational garbage disposal at the wrong moment, I’m pretty sure I’d still have enough digits left to represent our movie tally for the year. We just rarely do it, even though I have a stack of free movie passes from my credit card’s reward program.
Anyway, last night we decided to check out the new Harry Potter movie, and I realized: I am horrifically out of practice of viewing a movie in a public place. I’m just not good at it.
For starters, the previews took 20 minutes. Even if I’m entertained by previews, that’s not what I’m there to see so they just make me impatient. Once the previews subsided, unfortunately the conversation occurring directly behind us didn’t – even with Alan turned around staring directly at the two loud women.
Their conversation wasn’t the only unfortunate thing about them – every so often I would get smacked upside the head by the most pungent body odor I could imagine, making me glad I’d declined Alan’s offer for popcorn. I was tempted to turn around and stare at them just to figure out who or what was doing the wafting.
And then there was the movie… I hate to say this (really, I do) because I’m a fan of Harry Potter. But this latest installment? BO-RING. I found myself fidgeting and checking my watch to see how much longer I’d need to sit there. Even with plush stadium seats, my butt fell asleep and I started crossing/uncrossing and jiggling my legs with such rapidity that Alan asked me if I was OK.
As the movie neared what I hoped was its end, I was actually relieved to hear other people around me muttering things like, “Let’s wrap it up,” and “C’mon. Seriously?” every time there seemed to be a natural ending point that was ignored.
I guess I’ve just gotten used to watching movies from the comfort of my home, where I can pause it, do another task (like pay the bills) simultaneously, or eject it and walk away if I decide it’s bad. Oh, and also? I can wear my fleece performance uniform when I watch from home – the one with the magic pockets full of Gobstoppers.
Leaving the theatre, Alan asked what I thought of the movie.
My summary: The only way that movie could’ve been any worse is if it had been called “Hairy Pooter.”
pithypants 
I thought the first part of the last book was pretty boring also. In fact, I thought the first half of the last 3 books were slow, and only appreciated their nuances after rereading. When I heard the movie was going to be a 2 parter, I suspected that might be a mistake. I’m still going to go see it, however.
I agree… we decided that the editors thought that more pages meant more sales, so they stopped trying to trim/edit down JKR’s prose as the series wore on. On the upside: I guess the movie’s director was true to the book for once.