Tag Archives: Addictions

Service with a smile… no, really!

25 Feb

If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck, then it's probably a duck.

Have you ever tried Cosi’s flatbreads? They’re essentially pizzas, but they don’t call them that. They should, because it would help set better expectations. I’m fine waiting 10 minutes for a pizza to come out of an oven; I am NOT fine waiting for a “flatbread” to be handed to me with melted cheese.

I only order a flatbread if I’ve packed an activity in my pocket – like my iPhone – so I don’t have to twiddle my thumbs waiting for it to crawl through the oven. Yesterday I ordered a pizza flatbread, tucked into a chair and amused myself while it cooked. When it was ready, the woman who presented it to me was wild with enthusiasm.

“Pepperoni! Pepperoni! Pepperoni Flatbread!” She had actually invented a SONG using my Pepperoni Flatbread as her inspiration. I will admit, it got me slightly more excited about my impending meal. Continue reading

Reminder: Just because you’re an adult doesn’t mean you have to be lame.

24 Feb

Today when I went to the DC Pool to swim, a little girl skipped past me up the sidewalk and shouted, “Hi!” Inside at the check-in desk, she explained to me that her mom would be signing her in later. Friendly little thing, I thought.

In the locker room, separated by a row of lockers, she shouted, “Do you have your swimsuit on under your clothes?” I assumed her mom had shown up. But then, ten seconds later, she yelled the exact same thing, only louder, and came walking around the lockers to look at me.

I faced her, topless, and said, “Apparently not.”

Continue reading

Book Nazi

23 Feb

I love DC’s public libraries. It’s a great system with a wonderful selection and lots of locations. What I don’t love is the woman they’ve hired in the last year to work the desk at MY branch in the West End. I first encountered her three weeks ago in the wake of DC’s big snow storm when I stopped in to pick-up a book they were holding for me.

Note: I said this was in the wake of the storm, so the streets were hardly passable and there was absolutely no parking available. I swung by for what I hoped was a quick errand on my way to stick my car in the parking garage under my office. The challenge was that parking outside the library was lacking.

Because there was NO other traffic, I double parked, right in the middle of the street, turned my hazards on, and ran in. The book was behind the desk, marked with my name, I had my library card in my hand leading me through the door – all told it should’ve been a 30 second transaction.

That is, until I encountered Rita the Regulator. Continue reading

Because massage is an Olympic sport

15 Feb

To celebrate Valentine’s Day, last night Alan and I attended a 2.5 hour Thai massage workshop offered by an instructor at my yoga studio. We both like to rub and be rubbed, so I thought it sounded fun.

The vibe was a bit like what I suspect one experiences at a Lamaze class – couples huddled together on blankets with men exhibiting varying levels of interest and embarrassment. Almost immediately, one couple stood out.

Continue reading

Exactly WHERE are you putting that butt wipe?

13 Feb

Apparently they just put a baby on the label because it's less frightening than a middle aged man or a dog.

I stopped by CVS on my way home from yoga this morning to pick up some nail glue for my thumb. (Last week I sliced right through it with a serrated knife, and as it’s growing out, it’s getting UGLY.)

Anyway, I’m standing there, considering my options, shoulder to shoulder with a somewhat prissy man facing the opposite shelf. He was on his cell phone, and as such, in something of a privacy bubble that be believes makes his conversation impossible to overhear. NOT.

Continue reading