This is going to be me in 40 years.
Today, in (an extended) celebration of my birthday, I played hookey was given the day off work because it’s our company’s policy to consider your birthday a holiday. (Yay!)
So what did I do, you ask?
Well… First, I woke at 6am. And listened to NPR lazily from the comfort of my soft sheets for an hour. Because that’s what taking a day off looks like, when you’re a nerd. (We nerds know how to party.)
Then I made myself a perfect mug of espresso, before hitting a yoga class. Probably not the best sequencing of diet/activity.
But also not the worst, it turns out.
Not to out-do myself, after yoga (practically starving from the exertion) I demolished a tub of bean soup — without thinking about the massage appointment I’d scheduled a mere two hours later. Um. As soon as I was pleasantly full and tipped back in my recliner, I realized what I’d done.
Slightly panicked, I chatted my sister. Her advice? Take an egg and peel it in the lobby. Why? To really stink up the joint. Helpful. Thanks.
I shouldn’t have worried. Everything turned out JUST FINE. (But I did hit the ATM on my way, lest compensation need to run more along the lines of “damages” than tip.)
Turns out, I shouldn’t have worried. My masseuse was AWESOME. A recent grad of the Potomac Massage Training Institute, Judith had fantastic technique and perfect pressure. She started by rubbing my face, working down the center line and pulling her fingers to opposite sides as if smoothing out my wrinkles. When she got to my mouth, I had clear lip balm on and I could feel bits of it streaking along my jowls as she pulled.
That gave me the giggles, imagining the same motion performed on someone wearing bright red lipstick. I think I unnerved Judith with my giggles, because she then started performing frequent pressure-checks to make sure I was comfortable. I ended up giving her a great tip just so she’d think me a wee bit less creepy for laughing during my massage.
Thoroughly relaxed, on my way to Jeffrey Eugenides’s reading at Sixth & Eye, I met my friend Betsy at Estadio for a quick bite. As always, the food was fantastic. And it was great to catch up with Betsy, who just returned from Italy and looked like a Roman fashion plate.
I’ll save the Eugenides review for a separate entry (spoiler alert: two thumbs up!), because it doesn’t seem appropriate to review a Pulitzer Prize winning author in the same 500 word post in which I consider peeling an egg to provide myself aromatic cover. I’ll go so far as to suggest that the two belong on different levels. Hint: I’m pretty sure a 12 year old lives on one of those levels.
So now, I’m home, relaxed and smiling, content from a nearly perfect day, about to call it a night. Except, every time I scratch myself, I end up with muck under my nails. I’d like to think it’s the massage oil, but at my (new) age, it’s possible I’m just starting to disintegrate.
I guess it’s good that I indulged myself today: At this pace, there won’t be anything left of me to celebrate another birthday.
pithypants 
Happy Birthday!! I’m glad you indulged yourself today, it’s good to be pampered every once in a while.
Happy Birthday! How nice of your company to “give” you the day off in honor of your birth.
Is that picture for real? I definitively need more exercise! Hope you had a great birthday!!
It IS. This is apparently some Aussie in her 80s who kicks butt at yoga.
that sounds like a nice chiller bday. I went to work on mine. boo hiss
Serious boo hiss. I’m sorry!
All in all, a pretty nice way to spend your birthday. Now you’ve got to work on topping it next year!
You’re not disintegrating, your reinventing. How’s that for putting a positive spin on aging and that perfect day of yours?
So, I bahahahahaha’d out loud when I got to the part about the bean soup. Excellent stroke of luck there vis-a-vis the massage… what with how those rub-downs get the gastric juices going and turn all other bits to jelly. Also, I sort of adore your sister. Hope your birthday stretches on so you can enjoy yourself a little more!
My sister likes to pretend I’m David Sedaris so she can play the Rooster. I kind of hate to burst her bubble.
Yeah, I’m starting to feel like a caracature (sp?) of somebody, maybe myself. I should start a blog in which Miss Pithy makes the occasional appearance for comic relief. Maybe I will, just out of spite. And it will have lots of photos of my monkey (just as soon as I buy back him off e-bay).
I recently found your blog and subscribed. This post is self deprecation at its finest- Happy belated bday!
Great post. What a fabulous day you had, that sounds like my kind of day off – and they never happen often enough, right? Happy birthday! (and the beans issue was classic!)
Now that’s a woman in good shape. Who wouldn’t wanna be her at that age?
Happy belated birthday.