I pride myself on efficiency, but today I realized that it’s not always desirable to be efficient.
I realized this on my way to the bathroom at work, when the latest issue of People Magazine caught my eye on the reception desk. Without thinking, I grabbed it so I could skim the photos on my walk to the bathroom. It only occurred to me as I opened the bathroom door and encountered a co-worker what it might look like:
Oh, there goes Alison, disappearing into the bathroom with a People Magazine. Guess we won’t see her for a solid 20 minutes. (Like the use of solid there – impressive, no?)
Because I’m a slow learner, I didn’t take time to process the realization about efficiency not always being a good thing. Instead, I whipped into a stall with my pants already unbuttoned. I didn’t bother closing the door because the bathroom was empty and it saved time.
And right about then, someone else wandered into the bathroom, causing me to hastily slam my door and lock it. I’m sure she wondered what was going on – because it was pretty obvious that I’d been sitting there with my door open, peeing like a race horse while – potentially – looking at myself in the mirror.
Finally, when I looked down I noticed the underwear I’d put on (on my way from the shower to the bathroom – again in the name of efficiency, I hadn’t turned on the light), I started cracking up. I don’t even remember buying them, but they look like something a child should wear.
The underwear = black with pink trim, and written across the front in metallic purple was one word:
GROOVIN’
Yep. Somehow that sounds about right.
pithypants 
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