Tag Archives: Travel

I’m supposed to be the only one who takes a job THAT seriously

3 Apr

Dear Mr. Rooster,

Yes, I hear you. It’s 6:46am and because I’m a freak of nature, I’ve been up and working since 5:30am. So yes, I heard your very first cockadoodledoo this morning, and to your credit, I thought it was cute. “Ah look,” I said to myself, “I’m in the COUNTRY. A natural alarm clock!” I kicked my feet around in my soft line-dried sheets, enjoyed the unseasonably warm breeze that blew through my window and reveled in all things rural.

But you’ve been going at this for a solid 15 minutes now, and I’m beginning to wonder: Where is the fire? You’re starting to sound hoarse and I don’t understand how you’re even finding time to breathe between bleets any more. I appreciate your dedication, but buddy, it’s a Saturday. I hate to break it to you, but I don’t think anyone is listening.

Oh wait – apparently your friend, Lazy Dan, can hear you, because now he’s joined you. Only, he sounds more like he’s screaming bloody murder than actually crowing. The two of you make quite a tag team out there. He’s Laverne to your Shirley – or perhaps Lennie to your Squiggy? Between the two of you, I’m thinking the sound of police sirens and chopper blades in DC would be a bit more restful.

In closing, a question for you: how did you reset your clock for Daylight Savings Time? I mean, it’s not like you wear a wristwatch on that little foot of yours, and I can’t imagine that three weeks ago you were cawing at 5:45 am.

That’s all. Keep up the good work over there. I’m sure our neighbors appreciate your efforts, even if they’re blatantly ignoring you and sleeping in this morning. At least I hope so, because otherwise you might be on the path to cock soup.

Regards,

Alison

Tags: ,

Leaving Captiva: Part Two – Should you really be driving?

24 Mar

Happy trails, Captiva. Thanks for the solitude - we needed it to prepare for Carol.

When we landed on the dock at Pine Island Marina Sunday morning, we looked around wondering if Richard would be shuttling us to the airport. Alas, instead of a Lincoln Town Car, there was a white van driven by an older woman named Carol waiting to take us and another family to Fort Myers.

(The other family consisted of a woman in her mid-forties and her two middle school-aged sons, who had struck us as spoiled earlier in the week when we’d encountered them at the pool bar as they ordered one of everything. We weren’t looking forward to sharing a van with them, but… Econolines make strange bed fellows.)

Settled in the van, we started our 75 minute drive to the airport. Except Carol drove consistently 5 mph under the limit, so after some quick math, let’s make that an 85 minute drive. We quickly learned that Carol liked to talk. And talk. And talk.

Continue reading →

Tags: , ,

Leaving Captiva: Part I – Ansel Adams’ Revenge

22 Mar

Wishful thinking...

Yesterday morning we caught a water taxi from Captiva to the mainland right at sunrise to ensure we made it to the airport in time for our flight. We were hating life as we drove our golf cart along the deserted path to the dock, but our attitudes turned around when we realized we’d actually get a chance to see the sunrise as we left. (Since our house is on the NW side of the island, we saw gorgeous sunsets every night, but never got to actually see the sun appear in the morning.)

As soon as the boat left the harbor, the view was stunning. Everyone fumbled to pull out cameras and grab a quick shot.

Everyone, that is, except for a guy Alan soon nicknamed Ansel Adams. We should’ve realized when he stepped on the boat with a tripod under his arm instead of a suitcase that this guy was NO JOKE.

Continue reading →

Tags: ,

  • Comments 1 Comment
  • Categories Uncategorized

Health reform? Won’t punching my NP do the trick?

22 Mar

Halfway through our vacation, I got sick. I woke up with a sore throat, my head was stuffy, my nose was snotty… and it got progressively worse as the week unfolded. By the time we left for the airport on Sunday, I was rating myself at 45% of normal functionality and my amateur diagnosis was “sinus infection.”

When we got to the airport (the journey itself merits an entirely separate post), I popped a Benadryl, thinking that it would help dry out my sinuses and make the flight a bit less painful. (Both Alan and I travel frequently for work, so we’re no strangers to the pain that is flying with a sinus infection.)

It seemed to work – until the plane began its descent into DC. At that point it felt like someone was hammering nails into my ears and eyes. I tried desperately to yawn; I swallowed repeatedly; I tugged on my ears. Yet nothing helped.

Continue reading →

Tags: ,

You say tomato, I say cockroach

17 Mar

OK. People in Florida need to end their denial: I hate to break it to you, but there is no such thing as a Palmetto Beetle. It is simply a tourism marketer’s renaming of a cockroach!

How do I know? Because I’ve killed two of them since arriving in Florida Sunday, and they sure look like cockroaches to me.

I tried to convince myself that they really weren’t that disgusting because – hey – they were palmetto beetles, not roaches. But guess what? I’m not buying it. I tried to calm my nerves by googling “palmetto beetle,” and you be the judge (especially top right and lower center):

And if I’ve killed two of them while staying in a high-end home that was literally just built (we’re only the third people to stay here), I can’t imagine how infested most of the houses down here are. Remind me of this when I decide to retire to Florida when I’m 70.

Tags: , ,

← Older Entries
Newer Entries →