Touch my monkey.

27 Oct

With Halloween approaching, my sister and I were recently chatting on Facebook about costumes. She was planning to go as Frida Kahlo, the Mexican painter.

Me: That’s a bit obscure. How would people know?
Alicia: Long wig. Flowy Mexican dress. Uni-brow. Mustache. Monkey.

Me: Got it.

Fortunately, she lives in Ann Arbor, so most of her (well-educated and artistic) friends would be able to put that together. If I tried to pull that off in DC, where things run a bit more political and less cerebral, I think people would just think I was aiming going as a transvestite with a monkey fetish.

A few days later, I chatted her again.

Me: How is the costume progressing?
Alicia: It’s not. Too expensive. I’m at $35 already and I don’t even have the wig or the monkey. Pulling the plug. Besides, I don’t know where I would get a monkey.
Me: What about that monkey you had when we were kids?
Alicia: ???
Me: The puppet. Where you velcroed its arms around your neck and stuck your hand up it?
Alicia: I had this monkey?
Me: Yes. It had a squeaker in its mouth you could squeeze.
Alicia: Sounds like you were jealous of my monkey. You remember it a little too well.
Me: I was. You wouldn’t let me play with it.
Alicia: Had I known, I would’ve worn it around constantly.

Me: No doubt.

And because older sisters never outgrow their urge to taunt and get a rise out of their younger siblings, the next day this is what she posted on my Facebook Wall:

In case you’re curious, her latest costume idea is even better than Frida and would play well anywhere. Any guesses?

That’s right – she’s going as a bad ventriloquist. We’ve already decided that has the potential for sheer comedy after a few glasses of wine.

The best part? She’s been practicing saying, “Who’s your daddy?” through gritted teeth all week, which – even without the puppet – is pretty awesome.

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15 Responses to “Touch my monkey.”

  1. Shivani Allgaier October 27, 2011 at 6:10 am #

    I love your humor! As a child my sister was always crying her heart out because she wished to have a living monkey. Gosh – I was thankful that she didn’t succeed!

    • Eilonvi October 27, 2011 at 7:29 am #

      LOL 🙂 loved your post. Going as Frida is kinda funny in itself 🙂

      • Eilonvi October 27, 2011 at 7:30 am #

        Actully, didn’t mean to reply to Shivani, but have a stand alone comment… but you get me.

  2. Byron MacLymont October 27, 2011 at 7:56 am #

    I am just drawing such a blank for a costume this year. Maybe I’ll just go as “guy who gets jealous of everyone else’s good ideas.” Although, it sounds like Frida just opened up…

    • pithypants October 27, 2011 at 8:03 am #

      Something to be said for a man dressed as Frida. Please send pics.

      • cassiebehle October 27, 2011 at 10:02 am #

        This is the first year I have decided to forgo all Halloween shenanigans. Except for the pumpkin patch. And carving a pumpkin. And handing out candy. Yup, just giving up on the whole thing. I can’t wait! Is it too late to start dieting for a costume involving a skintight catsuit?

  3. thesinglecell October 27, 2011 at 10:59 am #

    Well look who’s been FP’d! Congrats! As to Frida and the monkey, honestly, if I saw that I would likely think it had more to do with that animal breakout in Ohio. I would also assume the monkey had herpes, which had somehow caused Frida’s unibrow. Or perhaps I would think the unibrow and long hair, paired with the monkey, implied something about evolution.

    I am fairly sure no one in Michigan would think these things.

    • pithypants October 27, 2011 at 11:08 am #

      Ha! Herpe Monkey. Now you’ve given me a whole new nightmare. Hope the traffic generates some hits for you from the blogroll too! 🙂

  4. Kimberly Pugliano October 27, 2011 at 1:17 pm #

    Your sister to sister relationship mirrors mine with my sister. Some of her funniest Facebook posts are the ones that make absolutely no sense whatsoever to anyone else in the entire world but leave me rolling on the floor in laughter, trying not to pee.

  5. squirrel circus October 27, 2011 at 2:47 pm #

    Great post! Don’t be too jealous…I had a monkey like that when I was a kid too…and also had a younger sibling to taunt with it.

  6. Lorna's Voice October 27, 2011 at 3:42 pm #

    Hey, my friend, I noticed one of your earlier post got Freshly Pressed! CONGRATULATIONS!!!!! 🙂 🙂 🙂

    • pithypants October 27, 2011 at 5:14 pm #

      Thanks! Feels like I won the jackpot!

  7. whatimeant2say October 27, 2011 at 9:46 pm #

    I love both costume ideas! It sounds like you and your sister both inherited the humor gene!

    • pithypants October 28, 2011 at 6:38 am #

      The difference? Her sense of humor is more twisted than mine. Now she’s talking about being the ventriloquist’s dummy for Halloween.

  8. An Observant Mind October 28, 2011 at 5:39 pm #

    Love it! Actually I love both of them, your sister has killer ideas.

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