Tag Archives: life

A Week of Affirmation

6 Aug

One of the reasons I moved to Richmond was for a greater sense of community. I loved living in DC and had a strong sense of pride for the city, but at its heart, DC is transient. Most of my friends slowly migrated out of the city – first to nearby suburbs when they had children, then more farther afield as jobs carried them and their spouses to other cities and states. For those who stayed in DC, the addition of vacation homes meant they weren’t around as often.

In any case, as I started to see retirement creeping up in my (verrrrry) peripheral vision, I realized that I wanted to be somewhere that had a hopping cultural scene AND a rich, stable friend group. I also realized that making friends later in life wouldn’t be as easy as it was in my 20s, so if I wanted to be surrounded by good friends before I’m using a walker, I’d need to start actively working to meet people NOW.

I say all of this explain why, Wednesday night, as I sat in a lawn chair listening to a porch concert, I had an overwhelming sense of satisfaction with my move. Let me tell serve up a summary of this past week so you can see why I’m so happy here…

Sunday, 4pm: I met up with my dear friend Kelly (whom I originally met through the Georgetown coaching program back in 2014) for what we thought was going to be a Jazz Concert in Byrd Park… but it turns out I had the date wrong (by a week!) so we just ended up tossing a blanket and catching up for an hour.

Sunday, 8pm: I ran over to Dogwood Dell, where – as part of the annual Arts in the Park program – “Something Rotten” (a Broadway musical that I first saw at The National in DC a few years back) was playing. I didn’t know how long I would stay (since 8pm is often my bedtime!) so I didn’t bother inviting anyone to join me. Not to worry – I was seated next to a nice couple who chatted with me until the curtain lifted. It was a quality production that rivaled the touring company I saw in DC!

Monday, 9am: I met up with friends at Bryan Park to play pickleball for an hour before work.

Tuesday, 6pm: I stepped out onto my front porch and saw my neighbor, Paige, out rocking her four month old baby. I went over to visit with her. Within minutes, we were sitting there with her husband and neighbors from two other houses, sharing a bottle of wine.

Wednesday, 7am: As I finished watering the flowers on my front porch, my next door neighbor returned from walking her dog. We had a quick visit and I offered to babysit her son next week so she and her husband could go to a concert. As we were talking, another neighbor walked up in his pajamas with a mug of tea for a morning porch visit.

Wednesday, 8am: I went to Bryan Park again to play pickleball with two new people I met a few weeks back. At 9am, my other pickleball friends, Paula and Roxanne, showed up to join us.

Wednesday, 6pm: I walked to Byrd Park for my tennis clinic with Coach Victor and two other women who were new to me. We all traded numbers so we could meet up to play some other time together. (I started lessons back in March and have met a dozen women who I see off-and-on twice a week for Doubles and Clinic. A few of us have met up for concerts and pool time outside of tennis.)

Wednesday, 7:30pm: I went to Michelle and Roxane’s house for a porch concert. I originally met them a couple months back at a Coming Together Virginia meeting and invited them over one night. They repaid the favor by inviting me to their porch concert – a really talented musician (Gabriel Wheaton) who is touring the US giving concerts. Check out this video:

Thursday, 7am: I walked over to Byrd Park with my neighbor, David, to play tennis with his friend Rob, and him. While we were playing, completely uncoordinated, Coach Victor showed up to offer some encouragement.

Friday, 6pm: I walked over to the Virginia Museum of Fine Arts for “Rhythm on the River” – a weekend-long festival celebrating music in Richmond. This event was held in their outdoor Sculpture Garden, and I joined my friends Roxane and Michelle and their friends who were down from Fairfax. While there I also got to visit with two neighbors from my block who stopped by with their dogs.

Saturday, 9am: Tennis at Byrd Park with Coach Victor and three women I’ve played with before.

Saturday, 5pm: Alan arrived for our regular Saturday night date!

OK. I realize this is NOT a pithy post and is more like an accounting ledger, but I’ve had a lot of friends ask me what Richmond’s like and if I’m meeting anyone. Here’s hoping I’ve answered THAT question!

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Unwanted Perspective

16 Apr

From our office window...

From our office window…

Like most Americans, I’ve spent much of the last 24 hours trying to process the Boston Marathon bombings. When there is so much to love about living, it is truly mind-boggling to realize there are other humans in this world – structurally built from the same materials as the rest of us – who not only can’t feel humbled before it, but feel entitled to strip others of that gift.

I’ve felt this way before. After Columbine. After 9/11. After the DC sniper. After Newtown…

What is new to me is how personal this attack feels. Even though the scale is smaller (at least from a fatality standpoint), this event has rocked me in ways that the others haven’t.

Maybe it’s because my company’s headquarters is smack-dab between the two explosions.

Or because I have more than a hundred colleagues (dozens of whom I consider friends) working in that building.

Or because I’ve mindlessly walked past the two bomb sites countless times in the last few years on my way to pick up lunch.

Or because my  friends were posting photos of the finish line from the office window that morning, celebrating how lucky they were to have such prime seats.

Or because it’s all too real to imagine my co-workers cowering under their desks, waiting for the third blast.

Or because I’d tried to fly in that morning but the hotel costs were prohibitively high – so I pushed my arrival back a day.

Or maybe it’s because all the news coverage shows my hotel and my office building… landmarks that previously made me think “home away from home,” when I saw them pulling into view.

I really don’t know.

Regardless of why this events hits me square in the gut, there are a few things I am certain of:

Those runners won’t stop running because a coward tried to steal their glory.

We should stop using the term “mastermind” when referring to a terrorist. Masterminds are people who find elegant solutions to difficult problems. Killing innocent people? Pretty much the opposite.

The bravery of the first responders – the people who turned to run into the smoke instead of away from it – only serves to underscore the cowardice of the person (or persons) who set those bombs.

The goodness of humanity far outweighs the few random assholes behind events like this. 

Just watch the news or check out your social media channels and you’ll see that last point affirmed over and over again:

The Bostonians who coordinated a directory of private homes where homeless runners could stay.

The outpouring of blood donations at Mass General and the Red Cross.

The stranger who gave his race medal to a first-time marathoner who was unable to finish because of the blast. 

The spectators who rose to the occasion and found themselves pushing wheelchairs and tearing away fencing to get to victims.

The locals who – walking home from their evacuated office buildings – took runners home with them and gave them warm clothes and helped them reconnect with their families. 

Life is good. People are good.

Those beliefs are fundamental differences that separate us from the people behind attacks like this.

Cling to it. Celebrate it. Embody it.

© 2013 Aaron Tango Tang

© 2013 Aaron Tango Tang

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List: 10 THINGS that make weekends even better

7 Jan

With all the talk of New Year’s Resolutions, it’s reminded me how much I like lists. They’re easier to read than paragraphs, and they’re much, MUCH easier to write. So this month, in addition to my regular babble about life, I’m going to share a few random lists with you.

List #1: 10 Things That Make Weekends Even Better Have the Ability to Ruin Your Weekend

  1. NPR’s weekend programming*
  2. Apple products*
  3. Bathtubs & books
  4. A garbage chute
  5. Scented candles
  6. Lamby
  7. Animals that let me touch them
  8. Jasmine tea
  9. The weather
  10. Yoga

*NPR and Apple almost canceled each other out and got eliminated from my list because today’s This American Life was about the sweatshops in China where Apple products are made. Ergo, today’s dose of irony: Apparently sweatshops make my weekend better, while people working in sweatshops don’t know what weekends are.

Great, now I feel like an asshole.

And sadly, Apple probably does a better job than most trying to make sure its vendors follow fair labor practices.

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Life is Precious.

3 Jun

So this is going to be less pithy and more serious than usual. A friend of mine from college died Tuesday.

I first met Jay Jones through my friend Todd. In college I worked at a sports bar called Tripper’s, where everyone who worked there worked together and partied together. Todd was one of only a handful of guys who worked there (did I mention it was a sports bar and that the waitresses wore spandex shorts, baseball jerseys and sports bras?) and although I suspect he liked the male:female ratio, he thought his friend Jay would be a nice addition to the crew.

Jay worked at another restaurant – something with fewer drinks and more sit-down dining – and Todd slowly began to pull him into the fold. First it was inviting him along for an after-hours drink at The Roadhouse Pub, then it was taking him golfing with Scott, Matt and Joe (hosts at Tripper’s), and the next thing we knew, Jay was a server working along with us. As was a pretty and sweet girl named Amy, who who went on to fall in love with Jay, marry him and have three kids with him.

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